From nobody Mon Nov 1 14:00:19 2021 Return-Path: X-Original-To: int-dir@ietf.org Delivered-To: int-dir@ietfa.amsl.com Received: from ietfa.amsl.com (localhost [IPv6:::1]) by ietfa.amsl.com (Postfix) with ESMTP id 6674D3A2F8A for ; Mon, 1 Nov 2021 14:00:18 -0700 (PDT) MIME-Version: 1.0 Content-Type: text/plain; charset="utf-8" Content-Transfer-Encoding: 7bit From: Carlos Bernardos via Datatracker To: X-Test-IDTracker: no X-IETF-IDTracker: 7.39.0 Auto-Submitted: auto-generated Precedence: bulk Reply-To: bevolz@gmail.com, cjbc@it.uc3m.es, Carlos Bernardos Message-ID: <163580041768.7447.3590436725513926501@ietfa.amsl.com> Date: Mon, 01 Nov 2021 14:00:18 -0700 Archived-At: Subject: [Int-dir] Open review assignments in intdir X-BeenThere: int-dir@ietf.org X-Mailman-Version: 2.1.29 List-Id: "This list is for discussion between the members of the Internet Area directorate." List-Unsubscribe: , List-Archive: List-Post: List-Help: List-Subscribe: , X-List-Received-Date: Mon, 01 Nov 2021 21:00:18 -0000 Hi all, The following reviewers have assignments: For telechat 2021-12-02 Reviewer LC end Draft Zhen Cao 2021-09-28 draft-ietf-pim-bfd-p2mp-use-case-09 Tim Chown 2021-10-26 draft-ietf-idr-bgp-ext-com-registry-03 Jean-Michel Combes 2021-10-27 draft-ietf-opsawg-ntf-09 Last calls: Reviewer LC end Draft Zhen Cao 2021-09-28 draft-ietf-pim-bfd-p2mp-use-case-09 Tim Chown 2021-10-26 draft-ietf-idr-bgp-ext-com-registry-03 Jean-Michel Combes 2021-10-27 draft-ietf-opsawg-ntf-09 Suresh Krishnan 2021-09-07 draft-ietf-bess-evpn-igmp-mld-proxy-14 Charles Perkins 2021-09-07 draft-ietf-bess-evpn-bum-procedure-updates-12 Next in the reviewer rotation: Donald Eastlake Brian Haberman Wassim Haddad Bob Halley Bob Hinden Sheng Jiang Tatuya Jinmei Jouni Korhonen Suresh Krishnan David Lamparter As a helpful reference for reviewers, please check the Directorates Guidelines available at: https://trac.ietf.org/trac/iesg/wiki/DirectoratesGuidelines Reviews must include the following boilerplate text in the comments sent: "I am an assigned INT directorate reviewer for . These comments were written primarily for the benefit of the Internet Area Directors. Document editors and shepherd(s) should treat these comments just like they would treat comments from any other IETF contributors and resolve them along with any other Last Call comments that have been received. For more details on the INT Directorate, see https://datatracker.ietf.org/group/intdir/about/ ." For INT Area documents, reviewers must provide a recommendation if the document is ready to go to Last Call and therefore be forwarded to the IESG. For non-INT Area document, the reviewer must give a recommendation as to how the INT ADs are to complete the ballot on the document and the reason for that recommendation. See https://www.ietf.org/iesg/voting-procedures.html. Comments provided MUST be in the order of significance (i.e., those issues that are serious and must be fixed (i.e., DISCUSS level issues) MUST be first). While comments on minor issues (typos, etc.) are welcome, they should be last. A template review response might be: -8-<- BEGIN TEMPLATE -8-<- I am an assigned INT directorate reviewer for . These comments were written primarily for the benefit of the Internet Area Directors. Document editors and shepherd(s) should treat these comments just like they would treat comments from any other IETF contributors and resolve them along with any other Last Call comments that have been received. For more details on the INT Directorate, see https://datatracker.ietf.org/group/intdir/about/ . [INT Area documents] Based on my review, the document [IS, IS NOT] ready to go to IETF Last Call and therefore [CAN, CANNOT] be forwarded to the IESG [Non-INT Area documents] Based on my review, if I was on the IESG I would ballot this document as [YES, NO OBJECTION, DISCUSS, RETURN TO WG (ABSTAIN)]. I have the following DISCUSS/ABSTAIN level issues: The following are other issues I found with this document that SHOULD be corrected before publication: The following are minor issues (typos, misspelling, minor text improvements) with the document: -8-<- END TEMPLATE -8-<- From nobody Mon Nov 8 07:17:05 2021 Return-Path: X-Original-To: int-dir@ietfa.amsl.com Delivered-To: int-dir@ietfa.amsl.com Received: from localhost (localhost [127.0.0.1]) by ietfa.amsl.com (Postfix) with ESMTP id 664F33A10F4; Mon, 8 Nov 2021 07:16:55 -0800 (PST) X-Virus-Scanned: amavisd-new at amsl.com X-Spam-Flag: NO X-Spam-Score: -1.901 X-Spam-Level: X-Spam-Status: No, score=-1.901 tagged_above=-999 required=5 tests=[BAYES_00=-1.9, DKIMWL_WL_HIGH=-0.001, DKIM_SIGNED=0.1, DKIM_VALID=-0.1, HTML_MESSAGE=0.001, RCVD_IN_MSPIKE_H2=-0.001, SPF_PASS=-0.001, URIBL_BLOCKED=0.001] autolearn=ham autolearn_force=no Authentication-Results: ietfa.amsl.com (amavisd-new); dkim=pass (1024-bit key) header.d=nokia.onmicrosoft.com Received: from mail.ietf.org ([4.31.198.44]) by localhost (ietfa.amsl.com [127.0.0.1]) (amavisd-new, port 10024) with ESMTP id tdQUmOK9xOu5; 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Mon, 8 Nov 2021 15:16:44 +0000 Received: from BY3PR08MB7060.namprd08.prod.outlook.com ([fe80::c481:f856:9121:e]) by BY3PR08MB7060.namprd08.prod.outlook.com ([fe80::c481:f856:9121:e%7]) with mapi id 15.20.4669.016; Mon, 8 Nov 2021 15:16:44 +0000 From: "Rabadan, Jorge (Nokia - US/Mountain View)" To: Pascal Thubert , "int-dir@ietf.org" CC: "bess@ietf.org" , "draft-ietf-bess-evpn-optimized-ir.all@ietf.org" , "last-call@ietf.org" Thread-Topic: Intdir telechat review of draft-ietf-bess-evpn-optimized-ir-09 Thread-Index: AQHXwcrGVw/SI+BbKU25KGBKl1FypqvtnAZB Date: Mon, 8 Nov 2021 15:16:44 +0000 Message-ID: References: <163430546454.7338.3215808111601421989@ietfa.amsl.com> In-Reply-To: <163430546454.7338.3215808111601421989@ietfa.amsl.com> Accept-Language: en-US Content-Language: en-US X-MS-Has-Attach: X-MS-TNEF-Correlator: authentication-results: cisco.com; dkim=none (message not signed) header.d=none;cisco.com; dmarc=none action=none header.from=nokia.com; x-ms-publictraffictype: Email x-ms-office365-filtering-correlation-id: abf4bc33-a2f4-42e2-b768-08d9a2cac644 x-ms-traffictypediagnostic: BY3PR08MB7123: x-microsoft-antispam-prvs: x-ms-oob-tlc-oobclassifiers: OLM:10000; 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boundary="_000_BY3PR08MB7060CF67564B0B8E86C5EF58F7899BY3PR08MB7060namp_" MIME-Version: 1.0 X-OriginatorOrg: nokia.com X-MS-Exchange-CrossTenant-AuthAs: Internal X-MS-Exchange-CrossTenant-AuthSource: BY3PR08MB7060.namprd08.prod.outlook.com X-MS-Exchange-CrossTenant-Network-Message-Id: abf4bc33-a2f4-42e2-b768-08d9a2cac644 X-MS-Exchange-CrossTenant-originalarrivaltime: 08 Nov 2021 15:16:44.1976 (UTC) X-MS-Exchange-CrossTenant-fromentityheader: Hosted X-MS-Exchange-CrossTenant-id: 5d471751-9675-428d-917b-70f44f9630b0 X-MS-Exchange-CrossTenant-mailboxtype: HOSTED X-MS-Exchange-CrossTenant-userprincipalname: 9A3dc4pYtBsWSwEDJ+21XJFNfMkWkBMBy6s1D2SQ3+ArjgWsXtgYkU3adQa4tBEdG85zvgYOGUeCAo37bShlpQ== X-MS-Exchange-Transport-CrossTenantHeadersStamped: BY3PR08MB7123 Archived-At: Subject: Re: [Int-dir] Intdir telechat review of draft-ietf-bess-evpn-optimized-ir-09 X-BeenThere: int-dir@ietf.org X-Mailman-Version: 2.1.29 Precedence: list List-Id: "This list is for discussion between the members of the Internet Area directorate." List-Unsubscribe: , List-Archive: List-Post: List-Help: List-Subscribe: , X-List-Received-Date: Mon, 08 Nov 2021 15:17:01 -0000 --_000_BY3PR08MB7060CF67564B0B8E86C5EF58F7899BY3PR08MB7060namp_ Content-Type: text/plain; charset="Windows-1252" Content-Transfer-Encoding: quoted-printable Hi Pascal, Thank you for the thorough review. All the changes are incorporated in vers= ion 10. Please see in-line. Thanks. Jorge From: Pascal Thubert via Datatracker Date: Friday, October 15, 2021 at 6:44 AM To: int-dir@ietf.org Cc: bess@ietf.org , draft-ietf-bess-evpn-optimized-ir.all@ie= tf.org , last-call@ietf.org= Subject: Intdir telechat review of draft-ietf-bess-evpn-optimized-ir-09 Reviewer: Pascal Thubert Review result: Ready with Issues https://datatracker.ietf.org/doc/draft-ietf-bess-evpn-optimized-ir/reviewre= quest/15116/ Intdir Review draft-ietf-bess-evpn-optimized-ir-09 I am an assigned INT directorate reviewer for draft-ietf-bess-evpn-optimized-ir-09. These comments were written primaril= y for the benefit of the Internet Area Directors. Document editors and shepherd(s) should treat these comments just like they would treat comments from any other IETF contributors and resolve them along with any other Last Call comments that have been received. For more details on the INT Directorate, see https://datatracker.ietf.org/group/intdir/about/. I find the document to be well written but would benefit for clarification = of what IR is (pro/con vs multicast tree, which node does what) at the very beginning. Overall I think the draft is ready with nits for publication. High level: I'm curious about link scope IPv6 multicast packets. I understa= nd that MLDv2 is forwarded following regular IR procedures. Isn't that the cas= e for all link scope IPv6 multicast (FF02::/16) ? [jorge] yes, I completed the relevant sentence to include them: =93AR-LEAF nodes SHALL send service-level BM control plane packets followin= g regular IR procedures. An example would be IGMP, MLD or PIM multicast pac= kets, and in general any packets using link-local scope multicast IPv4 or I= Pv6 packets. The AR-REPLICATORs MUST NOT replicate these control plane pack= ets to other overlay tunnels since they will use the regular IR-IP Address.= =94 [Page 2] The introduction uses IR as if the reader new what it is before h= and. Maybe a bit more explanantion could help. Also, a simple fig illustrating = NVE PE etc would help figure what is and does what, in particular what to expe= ct from an IR function. [jorge] I added a figure and explained the difference between IR and PIM ba= sed trees in NVO networks. Page 5 : define PMSI, e.g., copy the terminology from draft-ietf-bess-evpn-bum-procedure-updates [jorge] done Page 3 : "The Inclusive Multicast Ethernet Tag route (RT-3) and its PMSI Tunnel Attribute=92s (PTA) general format used in [RFC7432] are shown belo= w:" Unclear whether the below is the original format in RFC 7432 or the variati= on instantiated for this document, which flags are already defined and which a= re added by this spec. [jorge] clarified as follows: The Inclusive Multicast Ethernet Tag route (RT-3) as in [RFC7432] is shown in Figure 2 and it is used in this document without any modifications to its format. The PMSI Tunnel Attribute's (PTA) general format as in [RFC7432] is used in this document, only a new Tunnel Type and new flags are specified, as shown in Figure 3: For flags added for this spec to an existing field, it would make sense to = add that the flag positions are "suggested to IANA"? [jorge] added: 0 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 +---------------------------------+ +--+--+--+--+--+--+--+--+ | Flags (1 octet) | -> |x |E |x | T |BM|U |L | +---------------------------------+ +--+--+--+--+--+--+--+--+ | Tunnel Type (1 octets) | T =3D AR Type +---------------------------------+ BM =3D Broadcast and Multicast | MPLS Label (3 octets) | U =3D Unknown unicast +---------------------------------+ x =3D unassigned | Tunnel Identifier (variable) | +---------------------------------+ Figure 3: PMSI Tunnel Attribute (PTA) The Flags field in Figure 3 is 8 bits long as per [RFC7902], where the Extension flag (E) and the Leaf Information Required (L) Flag are already allocated. This document defines the use of 4 bits of this Flags field, and suggests the following allocation to IANA: Also, a figref would be nice as opposed to "below:" [jorge] figure references added, thanks. "This document defines the use of 4 bits of this Flags field:" It would be helpful to confirm the intuition that the bits are counted 0 to= 7 left to right. [jorge] I added the bit numbers in Figure 3 =96 see above. "MUST be set to an IP address of the PE that should be": strange construct. The effect of the "MUST" appears destroyed by the "should". [jorge] true - I changed =91should be=92 to =91is=92.. " The Tunnel Identifier and Next-Hop SHOULD be set to the same IP address as the Originating Router=92s IP address when the NVE/PE originates the route. The Next-Hop address is referred to as the AR-IP and SHOULD be different than the IR-IP for a given PE/NVE." What are the consequences of not obeying those SHOULD? Please explain there when/why the node uses both IR-IP and AR-IP. Some text= here would prepare for the reasons which can be inferred from behavior in page 1= 1/12 but are not explicitly given. [jorge] I modified the text for the Replicator-AR route as follows, let me = know if it helps (note that AR and IR forwarding modes are defined in the t= erminology section): - Replicator-AR route: this route is used by the AR-REPLICATOR to advertise its AR capabilities, with the fields set as follows: o Originating Router's IP Address MUST be set to an IP address of the PE that is common to all the EVIs on the PE (usually this is a loopback address of the PE). + The Tunnel Identifier and Next-Hop SHOULD be set to the same IP address as the Originating Router's IP address when the NVE/PE originates the route. Irrespective of the values in the Tunnel Identifier and Originating Router's IP Address fields, the ingress NVE/PE will process the received Replicator-AR route and will use the IP Address in the Next- Hop field to create IP tunnels to the AR-REPLICATOR. + The Next-Hop address is referred to as the AR-IP and MUST be different from the IR-IP for a given PE/NVE, unless the procedures in Section 8 are followed. o Tunnel Type =3D Assisted-Replication Tunnel. Section 11 provides the allocated type value. o T (AR role type) =3D 01 (AR-REPLICATOR). o L (Leaf Information Required) =3D 0 (for non-selective AR) or 1 (for selective AR). An NVE/PE configured as AR-REPLICATOR for a BD MUST advertise a Replicator-AR route for the BD and MAY advertise a Regular-IR route. The advertisement of the Replicator-AR route will indicate the AR- LEAFs what outer IP DA, i.e., the AR-IP, they need to use for IP encapsulated BM frames that use AR forwarding mode. The AR- REPLICATOR will forward an IP encapsulated BM frame in AR forwarding mode if the outer IP DA matches its AR-IP, but will forward in IR forwarding mode if the outer IP DA matches its IR-IP. Fig 1: please indicate the ACs [jorge] added the following above the figure: =93The PEs and NVEs in the diagram have TSes or VMs connected to their ACs.= =94 Page 11: " An AR-REPLICATOR will follow a data path implementation compatib= le with the following rules:" Should that be a MUST? [jorge] changed, thx Page 13:"In case of a failure on the selected AR-REPLICATOR, another AR-REPLICATOR will be selected" is that a SHOULD or a "MUST if available"? [jorge] I changed to a SHOULD, thx Page 13: "When an AR-REPLICATOR is selected, the AR-LEAF MUST send all the BM packets to that AR-REPLICATOR " contradicts "An AR-LEAF MAY select more than one AR-REPLICATOR and do either per-flow or per-BD load balancing." I guess it should say that the multicast packets are load-balance= d across of the selected ARs using unicast underlay encapsulation. [jorge] it refers to the one selected for a given flow or BD (if load balan= cing per flow or per BD is carried out). I changed the sentence to: o When an AR-REPLICATOR is selected for a given flow or BD, the AR-LEAF MUST send all the BM packets targeted to that AR- REPLICATOR Section 6: Maybe indicate what the selective method does (build 2 hops trees) and the consequence (failure if an AR prevents the AR Leaves attached to it to send= and receive multicast traffic till it's attached to a new AR. [jorge] added this (note that the AR-LEAF can still revert to IR in case of= AR-Rep failure in the selective method): The Selective AR procedures create multiple AR-LEAF-sets in the EVPN BD, and builds single-hop trees among AR-LEAFs of the same set (AR- LEAF->AR-REPLICATOR->AR-LEAF), and two-hop trees among AR-LEAFs of different sets (AR-LEAF->AR-REPLICATOR->AR-REPLICATOR->AR-LEAF). Compared to the Selective solution, the Non-Selective AR method assumes that all the AR-LEAFs of the BD are in the same set and always create two-hop trees among AR-LEAFs. While the Selective solution is more efficient than the Non-Selective solution in multi- stage IP fabrics, the trade-off is additional signaling and an additional outer source IP address lookup. Page 15 "Figure 1 is also used to describe the selective AR solution, howe= ver in this section we consider NVE2 as one more AR-LEAF for BD-1. ": please make that a new figure 2 [jorge] sure, figure added. page 17: "A Selective AR-REPLICATOR data path implementation will be compat= ible with the following rules: " MUST again? reword maybe? [jorge] yes, I changed it to =93MUST=94 --_000_BY3PR08MB7060CF67564B0B8E86C5EF58F7899BY3PR08MB7060namp_ Content-Type: text/html; charset="Windows-1252" Content-Transfer-Encoding: quoted-printable

Hi Pascal,

 

Thank you for the thorough review. All the changes are incorporated in ve= rsion 10.

 

Please see in-line.

Thanks.

Jorge

 

From: Pascal Thubert via Datatracker <norep= ly@ietf.org>
Date: Friday, October 15, 2021 at 6:44 AM
To: int-dir@ietf.org <int-dir@ietf.org>
Cc: bess@ietf.org <bess@ietf.org>, draft-ietf-bess-evpn-optimi= zed-ir.all@ietf.org <draft-ietf-bess-evpn-optimized-ir.all@ietf.org>,= last-call@ietf.org <last-call@ietf.org>
Subject: Intdir telechat review of draft-ietf-bess-evpn-optimized-ir= -09

Reviewer: Pascal Thubert
Review result: Ready with Issues

https://datatracker.ietf.org/doc/draft-ietf-bess-e= vpn-optimized-ir/reviewrequest/15116/

Intdir Review draft-ietf-bess-evpn-optimized-ir-09

I am an assigned INT directorate reviewer for
draft-ietf-bess-evpn-optimized-ir-09.  These comments were written pri= marily
for the benefit of the Internet Area Directors.  Document editors and<= br> shepherd(s) should treat these comments just like they would treat comments=
from any other IETF contributors and resolve them along with any other Last=
Call comments that have been received.  For more details on the INT Directorate, see https://datatracker.ietf.org/group/intdir/about/.

I find the document to be well written but would benefit for clarification = of
what IR is (pro/con vs multicast tree, which node does what) at the very beginning. Overall I think the draft is ready with nits for publication.
High level: I'm curious about link scope IPv6 multicast packets. I understa= nd
that MLDv2 is forwarded following regular IR procedures. Isn't that the cas= e
for all link scope IPv6 multicast (FF02::/16) ?

[jorge] yes, I completed the relevant sent= ence to include them:

=93AR-LEAF nodes SHALL send service-level = BM control plane packets following regular IR procedures. An example would = be IGMP, MLD or PIM multicast packets, and in general any packets using link-local scope multicast IPv4 or IPv6 packe= ts. The AR-REPLICATORs MUST NOT replicate these control plane packets to ot= her overlay tunnels since they will use the regular IR-IP Address.=94<= /o:p>



 [Page 2] The introduction uses IR as if the reader new what it is bef= ore hand.
 Maybe a bit more explanantion could help. Also, a simple fig illustra= ting NVE
 PE etc would help figure what is and does what, in particular what to= expect
 from an IR function.

[jorge] I added a figure and explained the= difference between IR and PIM based trees in NVO networks.



 Page 5 : define PMSI, e.g., copy the terminology from
 draft-ietf-bess-evpn-bum-procedure-updates

[jorge] done



 Page 3 : "The Inclusive Multicast Ethernet Tag route (RT-3) and = its PMSI
 Tunnel Attribute=92s (PTA) general format used in [RFC7432] are shown= below:"

Unclear whether the below is the original format in RFC 7432 or the variati= on
instantiated for this document, which flags are already defined and which a= re
added by this spec.

[jorge] clarified as follows:

   The Inclusive Multicast Ethernet = Tag route (RT-3) as in [RFC7432] is

   shown in Figure 2 and it is used = in this document without any

   modifications to its format. = ; The PMSI Tunnel Attribute's (PTA)

   general format as in [RFC7432] is= used in this document, only a new

   Tunnel Type and new flags are spe= cified, as shown in Figure 3:

 

 



For flags added for this spec to an existing field, it would make sense to = add
that the flag positions are "suggested to IANA"?

[jorge] added:

       =
            &nb=
sp;            =
          0  1  2&nb=
sp; 3  4  5  6  7
   +----------------------------=
-----+    +--+--+--+--+--+--+--+--+
   |  Flags (1 octet) =
            &nb=
sp;  | -> |x |E |x |  T  |BM|U |L |

   +----------------------------=
-----+    +--+--+--+--+--+--+--+--+


   |  Tunnel Type (1 octets=
)         |    T =3D=
 AR Type


   +----------------------------=
-----+    BM =3D Broadcast and Multicast

   |  MPLS Label (3 octets)=
          |    =
U =3D Unknown unicast


   +----------------------------=
-----+    x =3D unassigned


   |  Tunnel Identifier (va=
riable)   |


   +----------------------------=
-----+


 


       =
            Figure 3=
: PMSI Tunnel Attribute (PTA)


 


   The Flags field in Figure 3 i=
s 8 bits long as per [RFC7902], where


   the Extension flag (E) and th=
e Leaf Information Required (L) Flag are


   already allocated.  This=
 document defines the use of 4 bits of this


   Flags field, and suggests the=
 following allocation to IANA:


 


 







Also, a figref would be nice as opposed to "below:"


[jorge] figure references added, thanks.







"This document defines the use of 4 bits of this Flags field:"
It would be helpful to confirm the intuition that the bits are counted 0 to=
 7

left to right.


[jorge] I added the bit numbers in Figure =
3 =96 see above.







"MUST be set to an IP address of the PE that should be": strange =
construct.

The effect of the "MUST" appears destroyed by the "should&qu=
ot;.


[jorge] true - I changed =91should be=92 t=
o =91is=92..








"           &nb=
sp;      The Tunnel Identifier and

Next-Hop SHOULD be set to the same IP address as the

Originating Router=92s IP address when the NVE/PE originates the

route. The Next-Hop address is referred to as the AR-IP and

SHOULD be different than the IR-IP for a given PE/NVE."

What are the consequences of not obeying those SHOULD?

Please explain there when/why the node uses both IR-IP and AR-IP. Some text=
 here

would prepare for the reasons which can be inferred from behavior in page 1=
1/12

but are not explicitly given.


[jorge] I modified the text for the Replic=
ator-AR route as follows, let me know if it helps (note that AR and IR forw=
arding modes are defined in the terminology
 section):


   -  Replicator-AR route: =
this route is used by the AR-REPLICATOR to


      advertise i=
ts AR capabilities, with the fields set as follows:


 


      o  Ori=
ginating Router's IP Address MUST be set to an IP address of


       =
  the PE that is common to all the EVIs on the PE (usually this


        =
; is a loopback address of the PE).


 


       =
  +  The Tunnel Identifier and Next-Hop SHOULD be set to the same=



       =
     IP address as the Originating Router's IP address =
when the


       =
     NVE/PE originates the route.  Irrespective of=
 the values in


       =
     the Tunnel Identifier and Originating Router's IP =
Address


       =
     fields, the ingress NVE/PE will process the receiv=
ed


       =
     Replicator-AR route and will use the IP Address in=
 the Next-


       =
     Hop field to create IP tunnels to the AR-REPLICATO=
R.


 


       =
  +  The Next-Hop address is referred to as the AR-IP and MUST be=



       =
     different from the IR-IP for a given PE/NVE, unles=
s the


       =
     procedures in Section 8 are followed.


 


      o  Tun=
nel Type =3D Assisted-Replication Tunnel.  Section 11 provides


       =
  the allocated type value.


 


      o  T (=
AR role type) =3D 01 (AR-REPLICATOR).


 


      o  L (=
Leaf Information Required) =3D 0 (for non-selective AR) or 1


       =
  (for selective AR).


 


   An NVE/PE configured as AR-RE=
PLICATOR for a BD MUST advertise a


   Replicator-AR route for the B=
D and MAY advertise a Regular-IR route.


   The advertisement of the Repl=
icator-AR route will indicate the AR-


   LEAFs what outer IP DA, i.e.,=
 the AR-IP, they need to use for IP


   encapsulated BM frames that u=
se AR forwarding mode.  The AR-


   REPLICATOR will forward an IP=
 encapsulated BM frame in AR forwarding


   mode if the outer IP DA match=
es its AR-IP, but will forward in IR


   forwarding mode if the outer =
IP DA matches its IR-IP.


 







Fig 1: please indicate the ACs


[jorge] added the following above the figu=
re:


=93The PEs and NVEs in the diagram have TS=
es or VMs connected to their ACs.=94







Page 11: " An AR-REPLICATOR will follow a data path implementation com=
patible

   with the following rules:" Should that be a MUST?


[jorge] changed, thx







Page 13:"In case of a failure on the selected AR-REPLICATOR, another
          AR-REPLICATOR will b=
e selected" is that a SHOULD or a "MUST if

          available"?


[jorge] I changed to a SHOULD, thx







Page 13: "When an AR-REPLICATOR is selected, the AR-LEAF MUST send all=


          the BM packets to th=
at AR-REPLICATOR " contradicts

          "An AR-LEAF MAY=
 select more than one AR-REPLICATOR and do

          either per-flow or p=
er-BD load balancing."

          I guess it should sa=
y that the multicast packets are load-balanced

          across of the select=
ed ARs using unicast underlay encapsulation.


[jorge] it refers to the one selected for =
a given flow or BD (if load balancing per flow or per BD is carried out). I=
 changed the sentence to:


       o&nbs=
p; When an AR-REPLICATOR is selected for a given flow or BD, the=



       =
   AR-LEAF MUST send all the BM packets targeted to that AR-=



       =
   REPLICATOR


 







Section 6:



Maybe indicate what the selective method does (build 2 hops trees) and the<=
br>
consequence (failure if an AR prevents the AR Leaves attached to it to send=
 and

receive multicast traffic till it's attached to a new AR.


[jorge] added this (note that the AR-LEAF =
can still revert to IR in case of AR-Rep failure in the selective method):<=
o:p>


   The Selective AR procedures c=
reate multiple AR-LEAF-sets in the EVPN


   BD, and builds single-hop tre=
es among AR-LEAFs of the same set (AR-


   LEAF->AR-REPLICATOR->AR=
-LEAF), and two-hop trees among AR-LEAFs of


   different sets (AR-LEAF->A=
R-REPLICATOR->AR-REPLICATOR->AR-LEAF).


   Compared to the Selective sol=
ution, the Non-Selective AR method


   assumes that all the AR-LEAFs=
 of the BD are in the same set and


   always create two-hop trees a=
mong AR-LEAFs.  While the Selective


   solution is more efficient th=
an the Non-Selective solution in multi-


   stage IP fabrics, the trade-o=
ff is additional signaling and an


   additional outer source IP ad=
dress lookup.


 







Page 15  "Figure 1 is also used to describe the selective AR solu=
tion, however

   in this section we consider NVE2 as one more AR-LEAF for BD-1.=
 ":

   please make that a new figure 2


[jorge] sure, figure added.







page 17: "A Selective AR-REPLICATOR data path implementation will be c=
ompatible

   with the following rules: " MUST again? reword maybe?


[jorge] yes, I changed it to =93MUST=94
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List-Unsubscribe: , List-Archive: List-Post: List-Help: List-Subscribe: , X-List-Received-Date: Mon, 08 Nov 2021 15:51:34 -0000 VGhpcyBtYXkgYmUgb2YgaW50ZXJlc3QgZm9yIHlvdS4NCg0KQW55d2F5LCBJIHdpc2ggeW91IGFu IGludGVyZXN0aW5nIElFVEYgd2VlayAhDQoNCi3DqXJpYw0KDQrvu79PbiAwOC8xMS8yMDIxLCAx MzoxMCwgIldHQ2hhaXJzIG9uIGJlaGFsZiBvZiBKYXkgRGFsZXkiIDx3Z2NoYWlycy1ib3VuY2Vz QGlldGYub3JnIG9uIGJlaGFsZiBvZiBleGVjLWRpcmVjdG9yQGlldGYub3JnPiB3cm90ZToNCg0K ICAgIEEgbGFyZ2UgbnVtYmVyIG9mIGNvbW11bml0eSBtZW1iZXJzLCBlaXRoZXIgY3VycmVudGx5 IG9yIHByZXZpb3VzbHkgaW4gYSBsZWFkZXJzaGlwIHJvbGUsIGFyZSByZWNlaXZpbmcgZW1haWxz IGZyb20gVGltIE1jU3dlZW5leSA8dGltQGRyb3BudW1iZXIuY29tPiByZWxhdGluZyB0byBJRVRG IGRlY2lzaW9ucyB0aGV5IG1heSBoYXZlIGJlZW4gcGFydCBvZiBzb21lIHRpbWUgYWdvLiAgQXMg TXIgTWNTd2VlbmV5IGlzIHRocmVhdGVuaW5nIGxlZ2FsIGFjdGlvbiBhZ2FpbnN0IHRoZSBJRVRG IGFuZCBpbmRpdmlkdWFsIHBhcnRpY2lwYW50cywgcGxlYXNlIGRvIG5vdCByZXNwb25kIHRvIGhp cyBtZXNzYWdlcyBhbmQgcGxlYXNlIGZvcndhcmQgdGhlbSB0byBvdXIgY291bnNlbCwgQnJhZCBC aWRkbGUgKGNvcGllZCBpbikuDQoNCiAgICB0aGFua3MNCiAgICBKYXkNCg0KICAgIC0tIA0KICAg IEpheSBEYWxleQ0KICAgIElFVEYgRXhlY3V0aXZlIERpcmVjdG9yDQogICAgZXhlYy1kaXJlY3Rv ckBpZXRmLm9yZw0KDQoNCg== From nobody Tue Nov 9 12:08:35 2021 Return-Path: X-Original-To: int-dir@ietf.org Delivered-To: int-dir@ietfa.amsl.com Received: from ietfa.amsl.com (localhost [IPv6:::1]) by ietfa.amsl.com (Postfix) with ESMTP id DC0B93A106F for ; Tue, 9 Nov 2021 12:08:33 -0800 (PST) MIME-Version: 1.0 Content-Type: text/plain; charset="utf-8" Content-Transfer-Encoding: 7bit From: Carlos Bernardos via Datatracker To: X-Test-IDTracker: no X-IETF-IDTracker: 7.39.0 Auto-Submitted: auto-generated Precedence: bulk Reply-To: bevolz@gmail.com, cjbc@it.uc3m.es, Carlos Bernardos Message-ID: <163648851383.19158.46646725363372554@ietfa.amsl.com> Date: Tue, 09 Nov 2021 12:08:33 -0800 Archived-At: Subject: [Int-dir] Open review assignments in intdir X-BeenThere: int-dir@ietf.org X-Mailman-Version: 2.1.29 List-Id: "This list is for discussion between the members of the Internet Area directorate." List-Unsubscribe: , List-Archive: List-Post: List-Help: List-Subscribe: , X-List-Received-Date: Tue, 09 Nov 2021 20:08:34 -0000 Hi all, The following reviewers have assignments: For telechat 2021-12-02 Reviewer LC end Draft Zhen Cao 2021-09-28 draft-ietf-pim-bfd-p2mp-use-case-09 Tim Chown 2021-10-26 draft-ietf-idr-bgp-ext-com-registry-03 Jean-Michel Combes 2021-10-27 draft-ietf-opsawg-ntf-10 Donald Eastlake 2021-08-30 draft-ietf-alto-cdni-request-routing-alto-17 Bob Halley 2021-09-28 draft-ietf-sfc-nsh-tlv-09 Sheng Jiang 2021-10-27 draft-ietf-regext-rfc7484bis-04 Last calls: Reviewer LC end Draft Zhen Cao 2021-09-28 draft-ietf-pim-bfd-p2mp-use-case-09 Tim Chown 2021-10-26 draft-ietf-idr-bgp-ext-com-registry-03 Jean-Michel Combes 2021-10-27 draft-ietf-opsawg-ntf-10 Donald Eastlake 2021-08-30 draft-ietf-alto-cdni-request-routing-alto-17 Bob Halley 2021-09-28 draft-ietf-sfc-nsh-tlv-09 Sheng Jiang 2021-10-27 draft-ietf-regext-rfc7484bis-04 Suresh Krishnan 2021-09-07 draft-ietf-bess-evpn-igmp-mld-proxy-14 Charles Perkins 2021-09-07 draft-ietf-bess-evpn-bum-procedure-updates-13 Next in the reviewer rotation: Suresh Krishnan David Lamparter David Lawrence Ted Lemon Benno Overeinder Basavaraj Patil Tommy Pauly Charles Perkins Carlos Pignataro Dave Thaler As a helpful reference for reviewers, please check the Directorates Guidelines available at: https://trac.ietf.org/trac/iesg/wiki/DirectoratesGuidelines Reviews must include the following boilerplate text in the comments sent: "I am an assigned INT directorate reviewer for . These comments were written primarily for the benefit of the Internet Area Directors. Document editors and shepherd(s) should treat these comments just like they would treat comments from any other IETF contributors and resolve them along with any other Last Call comments that have been received. For more details on the INT Directorate, see https://datatracker.ietf.org/group/intdir/about/ ." For INT Area documents, reviewers must provide a recommendation if the document is ready to go to Last Call and therefore be forwarded to the IESG. For non-INT Area document, the reviewer must give a recommendation as to how the INT ADs are to complete the ballot on the document and the reason for that recommendation. See https://www.ietf.org/iesg/voting-procedures.html. Comments provided MUST be in the order of significance (i.e., those issues that are serious and must be fixed (i.e., DISCUSS level issues) MUST be first). While comments on minor issues (typos, etc.) are welcome, they should be last. A template review response might be: -8-<- BEGIN TEMPLATE -8-<- I am an assigned INT directorate reviewer for . These comments were written primarily for the benefit of the Internet Area Directors. Document editors and shepherd(s) should treat these comments just like they would treat comments from any other IETF contributors and resolve them along with any other Last Call comments that have been received. For more details on the INT Directorate, see https://datatracker.ietf.org/group/intdir/about/ . [INT Area documents] Based on my review, the document [IS, IS NOT] ready to go to IETF Last Call and therefore [CAN, CANNOT] be forwarded to the IESG [Non-INT Area documents] Based on my review, if I was on the IESG I would ballot this document as [YES, NO OBJECTION, DISCUSS, RETURN TO WG (ABSTAIN)]. I have the following DISCUSS/ABSTAIN level issues: The following are other issues I found with this document that SHOULD be corrected before publication: The following are minor issues (typos, misspelling, minor text improvements) with the document: -8-<- END TEMPLATE -8-<- From nobody Tue Nov 9 14:47:08 2021 Return-Path: X-Original-To: int-dir@ietf.org Delivered-To: int-dir@ietfa.amsl.com Received: from ietfa.amsl.com (localhost [IPv6:::1]) by ietfa.amsl.com (Postfix) with ESMTP id 8AB9D3A046A; Tue, 9 Nov 2021 14:47:01 -0800 (PST) MIME-Version: 1.0 Content-Type: text/plain; charset="utf-8" Content-Transfer-Encoding: 7bit From: Bob Halley via Datatracker To: Cc: draft-ietf-sfc-nsh-tlv.all@ietf.org, last-call@ietf.org, sfc@ietf.org X-Test-IDTracker: no X-IETF-IDTracker: 7.39.0 Auto-Submitted: auto-generated Precedence: bulk Message-ID: <163649802149.2765.2534157306702225276@ietfa.amsl.com> Reply-To: Bob Halley Date: Tue, 09 Nov 2021 14:47:01 -0800 Archived-At: Subject: [Int-dir] Intdir telechat review of draft-ietf-sfc-nsh-tlv-09 X-BeenThere: int-dir@ietf.org X-Mailman-Version: 2.1.29 List-Id: "This list is for discussion between the members of the Internet Area directorate." List-Unsubscribe: , List-Archive: List-Post: List-Help: List-Subscribe: , X-List-Received-Date: Tue, 09 Nov 2021 22:47:02 -0000 Reviewer: Bob Halley Review result: Ready I am an assigned INT directorate reviewer for draft-ietf-sfc-nsh-tlv-09. These comments were written primarily for the benefit of the Internet Area Directors. Document editors and shepherd(s) should treat these comments just like they would treat comments from any other IETF contributors and resolve them along with any other Last Call comments that have been received. For more details on the INT Directorate, see https://datatracker.ietf.org/group/intdir/about/ . Based on my review, if I was on the IESG I would ballot this document as YES. The following are other issues I found with this document that SHOULD be corrected before publication: none The following are minor issues (typos, misspelling, minor text improvements) with the document: none I found the document to be well organized and the metadata contexts to be well specified. I agree with the SECDIR last call review by Charlie Kaufman that it would have been nice to be specific about what to do when bad length values occur, but am not worried about it as I'd expect an implementation to do appropriate checking, including bounds checking, and then do something reasonable (i.e. ignore or reject the packet) if there is a problem. From nobody Mon Nov 15 13:51:11 2021 Return-Path: X-Original-To: int-dir@ietf.org Delivered-To: int-dir@ietfa.amsl.com Received: from ietfa.amsl.com (localhost [IPv6:::1]) by ietfa.amsl.com (Postfix) with ESMTP id BD3F13A0AE4 for ; Mon, 15 Nov 2021 13:51:08 -0800 (PST) MIME-Version: 1.0 Content-Type: text/plain; charset="utf-8" Content-Transfer-Encoding: 7bit From: Carlos Bernardos via Datatracker To: X-Test-IDTracker: no X-IETF-IDTracker: 7.39.0 Auto-Submitted: auto-generated Precedence: bulk Reply-To: bevolz@gmail.com, cjbc@it.uc3m.es, Carlos Bernardos Message-ID: <163701306868.26003.7708250477796769229@ietfa.amsl.com> Date: Mon, 15 Nov 2021 13:51:08 -0800 Archived-At: Subject: [Int-dir] Open review assignments in intdir X-BeenThere: int-dir@ietf.org X-Mailman-Version: 2.1.29 List-Id: "This list is for discussion between the members of the Internet Area directorate." List-Unsubscribe: , List-Archive: List-Post: List-Help: List-Subscribe: , X-List-Received-Date: Mon, 15 Nov 2021 21:51:09 -0000 Hi all, The following reviewers have assignments: For telechat 2021-12-02 Reviewer LC end Draft Zhen Cao 2021-09-28 draft-ietf-pim-bfd-p2mp-use-case-09 Tim Chown 2021-10-26 draft-ietf-idr-bgp-ext-com-registry-03 Jean-Michel Combes 2021-10-27 draft-ietf-opsawg-ntf-10 Donald Eastlake 2021-08-30 draft-ietf-alto-cdni-request-routing-alto-17 Sheng Jiang 2021-10-27 draft-ietf-regext-rfc7484bis-04 Last calls: Reviewer LC end Draft Zhen Cao 2021-09-28 draft-ietf-pim-bfd-p2mp-use-case-09 Tim Chown 2021-10-26 draft-ietf-idr-bgp-ext-com-registry-03 Jean-Michel Combes 2021-10-27 draft-ietf-opsawg-ntf-10 Donald Eastlake 2021-08-30 draft-ietf-alto-cdni-request-routing-alto-17 Sheng Jiang 2021-10-27 draft-ietf-regext-rfc7484bis-04 Suresh Krishnan 2021-09-07 draft-ietf-bess-evpn-igmp-mld-proxy-14 Charles Perkins 2021-09-07 draft-ietf-bess-evpn-bum-procedure-updates-13 Next in the reviewer rotation: Suresh Krishnan David Lamparter David Lawrence Ted Lemon Benno Overeinder Basavaraj Patil Tommy Pauly Charles Perkins Carlos Pignataro Dave Thaler As a helpful reference for reviewers, please check the Directorates Guidelines available at: https://trac.ietf.org/trac/iesg/wiki/DirectoratesGuidelines Reviews must include the following boilerplate text in the comments sent: "I am an assigned INT directorate reviewer for . These comments were written primarily for the benefit of the Internet Area Directors. Document editors and shepherd(s) should treat these comments just like they would treat comments from any other IETF contributors and resolve them along with any other Last Call comments that have been received. For more details on the INT Directorate, see https://datatracker.ietf.org/group/intdir/about/ ." For INT Area documents, reviewers must provide a recommendation if the document is ready to go to Last Call and therefore be forwarded to the IESG. For non-INT Area document, the reviewer must give a recommendation as to how the INT ADs are to complete the ballot on the document and the reason for that recommendation. See https://www.ietf.org/iesg/voting-procedures.html. Comments provided MUST be in the order of significance (i.e., those issues that are serious and must be fixed (i.e., DISCUSS level issues) MUST be first). While comments on minor issues (typos, etc.) are welcome, they should be last. A template review response might be: -8-<- BEGIN TEMPLATE -8-<- I am an assigned INT directorate reviewer for . These comments were written primarily for the benefit of the Internet Area Directors. Document editors and shepherd(s) should treat these comments just like they would treat comments from any other IETF contributors and resolve them along with any other Last Call comments that have been received. For more details on the INT Directorate, see https://datatracker.ietf.org/group/intdir/about/ . [INT Area documents] Based on my review, the document [IS, IS NOT] ready to go to IETF Last Call and therefore [CAN, CANNOT] be forwarded to the IESG [Non-INT Area documents] Based on my review, if I was on the IESG I would ballot this document as [YES, NO OBJECTION, DISCUSS, RETURN TO WG (ABSTAIN)]. I have the following DISCUSS/ABSTAIN level issues: The following are other issues I found with this document that SHOULD be corrected before publication: The following are minor issues (typos, misspelling, minor text improvements) with the document: -8-<- END TEMPLATE -8-<- From nobody Tue Nov 16 06:27:03 2021 Return-Path: X-Original-To: int-dir@ietfa.amsl.com Delivered-To: int-dir@ietfa.amsl.com Received: from localhost (localhost [127.0.0.1]) by ietfa.amsl.com (Postfix) with ESMTP id A0A383A00E3; Tue, 16 Nov 2021 06:27:02 -0800 (PST) X-Virus-Scanned: amavisd-new at amsl.com X-Spam-Flag: NO X-Spam-Score: -9.599 X-Spam-Level: X-Spam-Status: No, score=-9.599 tagged_above=-999 required=5 tests=[BAYES_00=-1.9, DKIM_SIGNED=0.1, DKIM_VALID=-0.1, DKIM_VALID_AU=-0.1, DKIM_VALID_EF=-0.1, RCVD_IN_MSPIKE_H2=-0.001, SPF_NONE=0.001, URIBL_BLOCKED=0.001, USER_IN_DEF_DKIM_WL=-7.5] autolearn=ham autolearn_force=no Authentication-Results: ietfa.amsl.com (amavisd-new); dkim=pass (1024-bit key) header.d=cisco.com header.b=f+5MXxMj; 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charset="utf-8" Content-ID: Content-Transfer-Encoding: base64 MIME-Version: 1.0 X-MS-Exchange-CrossTenant-AuthAs: Internal X-MS-Exchange-CrossTenant-AuthSource: PH0PR11MB4966.namprd11.prod.outlook.com X-MS-Exchange-CrossTenant-Network-Message-Id: 235df056-32f9-4b29-5f15-08d9a90d1741 X-MS-Exchange-CrossTenant-originalarrivaltime: 16 Nov 2021 14:26:33.7812 (UTC) X-MS-Exchange-CrossTenant-fromentityheader: Hosted X-MS-Exchange-CrossTenant-id: 5ae1af62-9505-4097-a69a-c1553ef7840e X-MS-Exchange-CrossTenant-mailboxtype: HOSTED X-MS-Exchange-CrossTenant-userprincipalname: mnGSLASW9QnPkEKfagbRuNDbYHQn62XoDjD7edMw9iwhwGPp0YdcuiNcbJrhjkRObgh2NngY24Ttvwnb7kYfgg== X-MS-Exchange-Transport-CrossTenantHeadersStamped: PH0PR11MB4965 X-OriginatorOrg: cisco.com X-Outbound-SMTP-Client: 173.37.102.16, xbe-rcd-001.cisco.com X-Outbound-Node: alln-core-10.cisco.com Archived-At: Subject: Re: [Int-dir] Intdir telechat review of draft-ietf-sfc-nsh-tlv-09 X-BeenThere: int-dir@ietf.org X-Mailman-Version: 2.1.29 Precedence: list List-Id: "This list is for discussion between the members of the Internet Area directorate." 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List-Unsubscribe: , List-Archive: List-Post: List-Help: List-Subscribe: , X-List-Received-Date: Tue, 23 Nov 2021 07:33:09 -0000 Hi all, The following reviewers have assignments: For telechat 2021-12-02 Reviewer LC end Draft Zhen Cao 2021-09-28 draft-ietf-pim-bfd-p2mp-use-case-09 Tim Chown 2021-10-26 draft-ietf-idr-bgp-ext-com-registry-03 Jean-Michel Combes 2021-10-27 draft-ietf-opsawg-ntf-10 Donald Eastlake 2021-08-30 draft-ietf-alto-cdni-request-routing-alto-17 Sheng Jiang 2021-10-27 draft-ietf-regext-rfc7484bis-04 Last calls: Reviewer LC end Draft Zhen Cao 2021-09-28 draft-ietf-pim-bfd-p2mp-use-case-09 Tim Chown 2021-10-26 draft-ietf-idr-bgp-ext-com-registry-03 Jean-Michel Combes 2021-10-27 draft-ietf-opsawg-ntf-10 Donald Eastlake 2021-08-30 draft-ietf-alto-cdni-request-routing-alto-17 Sheng Jiang 2021-10-27 draft-ietf-regext-rfc7484bis-04 Suresh Krishnan 2021-09-07 draft-ietf-bess-evpn-igmp-mld-proxy-14 Charles Perkins 2021-09-07 draft-ietf-bess-evpn-bum-procedure-updates-14 Next in the reviewer rotation: Suresh Krishnan David Lamparter David Lawrence Ted Lemon Benno Overeinder Basavaraj Patil Tommy Pauly Charles Perkins Carlos Pignataro Dave Thaler As a helpful reference for reviewers, please check the Directorates Guidelines available at: https://trac.ietf.org/trac/iesg/wiki/DirectoratesGuidelines Reviews must include the following boilerplate text in the comments sent: "I am an assigned INT directorate reviewer for . These comments were written primarily for the benefit of the Internet Area Directors. Document editors and shepherd(s) should treat these comments just like they would treat comments from any other IETF contributors and resolve them along with any other Last Call comments that have been received. For more details on the INT Directorate, see https://datatracker.ietf.org/group/intdir/about/ ." For INT Area documents, reviewers must provide a recommendation if the document is ready to go to Last Call and therefore be forwarded to the IESG. For non-INT Area document, the reviewer must give a recommendation as to how the INT ADs are to complete the ballot on the document and the reason for that recommendation. See https://www.ietf.org/iesg/voting-procedures.html. Comments provided MUST be in the order of significance (i.e., those issues that are serious and must be fixed (i.e., DISCUSS level issues) MUST be first). While comments on minor issues (typos, etc.) are welcome, they should be last. A template review response might be: -8-<- BEGIN TEMPLATE -8-<- I am an assigned INT directorate reviewer for . These comments were written primarily for the benefit of the Internet Area Directors. Document editors and shepherd(s) should treat these comments just like they would treat comments from any other IETF contributors and resolve them along with any other Last Call comments that have been received. For more details on the INT Directorate, see https://datatracker.ietf.org/group/intdir/about/ . [INT Area documents] Based on my review, the document [IS, IS NOT] ready to go to IETF Last Call and therefore [CAN, CANNOT] be forwarded to the IESG [Non-INT Area documents] Based on my review, if I was on the IESG I would ballot this document as [YES, NO OBJECTION, DISCUSS, RETURN TO WG (ABSTAIN)]. I have the following DISCUSS/ABSTAIN level issues: The following are other issues I found with this document that SHOULD be corrected before publication: The following are minor issues (typos, misspelling, minor text improvements) with the document: -8-<- END TEMPLATE -8-<- From nobody Wed Nov 24 03:41:42 2021 Return-Path: X-Original-To: int-dir@ietf.org Delivered-To: int-dir@ietfa.amsl.com Received: from ietfa.amsl.com (localhost [IPv6:::1]) by ietfa.amsl.com (Postfix) with ESMTP id 37A223A0DAC; Wed, 24 Nov 2021 03:41:28 -0800 (PST) MIME-Version: 1.0 Content-Type: text/plain; charset="utf-8" Content-Transfer-Encoding: 8bit From: Jean-Michel Combes via Datatracker To: Cc: draft-ietf-opsawg-ntf.all@ietf.org, last-call@ietf.org, opsawg@ietf.org X-Test-IDTracker: no X-IETF-IDTracker: 7.40.0 Auto-Submitted: auto-generated Precedence: bulk Message-ID: <163775408798.8060.4398675898995449315@ietfa.amsl.com> Reply-To: Jean-Michel Combes Date: Wed, 24 Nov 2021 03:41:28 -0800 Archived-At: Subject: [Int-dir] Intdir telechat review of draft-ietf-opsawg-ntf-10 X-BeenThere: int-dir@ietf.org X-Mailman-Version: 2.1.29 List-Id: "This list is for discussion between the members of the Internet Area directorate." List-Unsubscribe: , List-Archive: List-Post: List-Help: List-Subscribe: , X-List-Received-Date: Wed, 24 Nov 2021 11:41:29 -0000 Reviewer: Jean-Michel Combes Review result: Almost Ready Hi, I am an assigned INT directorate reviewer for draft-ietf-opsawg-ntf-10. These comments were written primarily for the benefit of the Internet Area Directors. Document editors and shepherd(s) should treat these comments just like they would treat comments from any other IETF contributors and resolve them along with any other Last Call comments that have been received. For more details on the INT Directorate, see https://datatracker.ietf.org/group/intdir/about/ . Based on my review, if I was on the IESG I would ballot this document as DISCUSS. I have the following DISCUSS: The document is well written and gives a good overview of the telemetry “environment”. But, I am really embarrassed by a sentence – hidden in a section not always read at the end of the document: “6. Security Considerations ... The Network Telemetry Framework is not applicable to networks whose endpoints represent individual users, such as general-purpose access networks.” Here are the reasons regarding this DISCUSS (1) I assume next IETF works on Telemetry will be based on this document; (2) Such a disclaimer should be clearly mentioned at the beginning of the document to avoid any future IETF proposal, based on this document, in the scope of this disclaimer; (3) A clarification of this disclaimer is needed. Indeed, this disclaimer is closing many useful use-cases like E2E telemetry (i.e., between customer device/application and provided service) for a service provider or, if I understand correctly this disclaimer, Telemetry based management of a personal IoT network (e.g., at home) by an end-user. The following are minor issues (typos, misspelling, minor text improvements) with the document: Some references need to be updated but this should be done during the RFC Editor process. Best regards, JMC. 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Wed, 24 Nov 2021 18:52:26 +0000 From: Haoyu Song To: Jean-Michel Combes , "int-dir@ietf.org" CC: "draft-ietf-opsawg-ntf.all@ietf.org" , "last-call@ietf.org" , "opsawg@ietf.org" Thread-Topic: Intdir telechat review of draft-ietf-opsawg-ntf-10 Thread-Index: AQHX4Sg6Yti7R1mehEacw3PIqEah8KwTBcYg Date: Wed, 24 Nov 2021 18:52:26 +0000 Message-ID: References: <163775408798.8060.4398675898995449315@ietfa.amsl.com> In-Reply-To: <163775408798.8060.4398675898995449315@ietfa.amsl.com> Accept-Language: en-US Content-Language: en-US X-MS-Has-Attach: X-MS-TNEF-Correlator: authentication-results: gmail.com; dkim=none (message not signed) header.d=none;gmail.com; dmarc=none action=none header.from=futurewei.com; x-ms-publictraffictype: Email x-ms-office365-filtering-correlation-id: 89388996-1b36-47d0-a516-08d9af7b8f40 x-ms-traffictypediagnostic: PH0PR13MB4969: x-microsoft-antispam-prvs: x-ms-oob-tlc-oobclassifiers: OLM:9508; x-ms-exchange-senderadcheck: 1 x-ms-exchange-antispam-relay: 0 x-microsoft-antispam: BCL:0; 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charset="us-ascii" Content-Transfer-Encoding: quoted-printable MIME-Version: 1.0 X-OriginatorOrg: Futurewei.com X-MS-Exchange-CrossTenant-AuthAs: Internal X-MS-Exchange-CrossTenant-AuthSource: PH0PR13MB4795.namprd13.prod.outlook.com X-MS-Exchange-CrossTenant-Network-Message-Id: 89388996-1b36-47d0-a516-08d9af7b8f40 X-MS-Exchange-CrossTenant-originalarrivaltime: 24 Nov 2021 18:52:26.7777 (UTC) X-MS-Exchange-CrossTenant-fromentityheader: Hosted X-MS-Exchange-CrossTenant-id: 0fee8ff2-a3b2-4018-9c75-3a1d5591fedc X-MS-Exchange-CrossTenant-mailboxtype: HOSTED X-MS-Exchange-CrossTenant-userprincipalname: RcwEl7Q5F/SZI0HeXpQuM4G+hzMBQOMKAojvBYeGexBPvqtHnnHRY8aiA+RA9Tn4o3mXs9UmXz8jpeTkiEZ+Nw== X-MS-Exchange-Transport-CrossTenantHeadersStamped: PH0PR13MB4969 Archived-At: Subject: Re: [Int-dir] Intdir telechat review of draft-ietf-opsawg-ntf-10 X-BeenThere: int-dir@ietf.org X-Mailman-Version: 2.1.29 Precedence: list List-Id: "This list is for discussion between the members of the Internet Area directorate." List-Unsubscribe: , List-Archive: List-Post: List-Help: List-Subscribe: , X-List-Received-Date: Wed, 24 Nov 2021 18:52:36 -0000 Hi Jean, Thank you very much for the review! Based on your suggestion, we'll move t= he disclaimer to the beginning of the document and provide more clarificati= on.=20 Best regards, Haoyu -----Original Message----- From: Jean-Michel Combes via Datatracker =20 Sent: Wednesday, November 24, 2021 3:41 AM To: int-dir@ietf.org Cc: draft-ietf-opsawg-ntf.all@ietf.org; last-call@ietf.org; opsawg@ietf.org Subject: Intdir telechat review of draft-ietf-opsawg-ntf-10 Reviewer: Jean-Michel Combes Review result: Almost Ready Hi, I am an assigned INT directorate reviewer for draft-ietf-opsawg-ntf-10. The= se comments were written primarily for the benefit of the Internet Area Dir= ectors. Document editors and shepherd(s) should treat these comments just like they= would treat comments from any other IETF contributors and resolve them alo= ng with any other Last Call comments that have been received. For more deta= ils on the INT Directorate, see https://nam11.safelinks.protection.outlook.= com/?url=3Dhttps%3A%2F%2Fdatatracker.ietf.org%2Fgroup%2Fintdir%2Fabout%2F&a= mp;data=3D04%7C01%7Chaoyu.song%40futurewei.com%7C77ca751175644cd8d80108d9af= 3f5b17%7C0fee8ff2a3b240189c753a1d5591fedc%7C1%7C0%7C637733508927650895%7CUn= known%7CTWFpbGZsb3d8eyJWIjoiMC4wLjAwMDAiLCJQIjoiV2luMzIiLCJBTiI6Ik1haWwiLCJ= XVCI6Mn0%3D%7C3000&sdata=3DSqcy5PJgbAQouh7b49rlIOvrGhOAA4tF5wpNf1bE9UM%= 3D&reserved=3D0 . Based on my review, if I was on the IESG I would ballot this document as DI= SCUSS. I have the following DISCUSS: The document is well written and gives a good overview of the telemetry "en= vironment". But, I am really embarrassed by a sentence - hidden in a sectio= n not always read at the end of the document: "6. Security Considerations = ... The Network Telemetry Framework is not applicable to networks whose endpoin= ts represent individual users, such as general-purpose access networks." Here are the reasons regarding this DISCUSS (1) I assume next IETF works on Telemetry will be based on this documen= t; (2) Such a disclaimer should be clearly mentioned at the beginning of t= he document to avoid any future IETF proposal, based on this document, in the scope of this disclaimer; (3) A clarification of this disclaimer is nee= ded. Indeed, this disclaimer is closing many useful use-cases like E2E telemetry= (i.e., between customer device/application and provided service) for a ser= vice provider or, if I understand correctly this disclaimer, Telemetry base= d management of a personal IoT network (e.g., at home) by an end-user. The following are minor issues (typos, misspelling, minor text improvements= ) with the document: Some references need to be updated but this should be done during the RFC E= ditor process. Best regards, JMC. From nobody Fri Nov 26 18:19:25 2021 Return-Path: X-Original-To: int-dir@ietf.org Delivered-To: int-dir@ietfa.amsl.com Received: from ietfa.amsl.com (localhost [IPv6:::1]) by ietfa.amsl.com (Postfix) with ESMTP id E46AC3A0C02; Fri, 26 Nov 2021 18:19:13 -0800 (PST) MIME-Version: 1.0 Content-Type: text/plain; charset="utf-8" Content-Transfer-Encoding: 7bit From: Donald Eastlake via Datatracker To: Cc: alto@ietf.org, draft-ietf-alto-cdni-request-routing-alto.all@ietf.org, last-call@ietf.org X-Test-IDTracker: no X-IETF-IDTracker: 7.40.0 Auto-Submitted: auto-generated Precedence: bulk Message-ID: <163797955386.15136.492591265431363669@ietfa.amsl.com> Reply-To: Donald Eastlake Date: Fri, 26 Nov 2021 18:19:13 -0800 Archived-At: Subject: [Int-dir] Intdir telechat review of draft-ietf-alto-cdni-request-routing-alto-17 X-BeenThere: int-dir@ietf.org X-Mailman-Version: 2.1.29 List-Id: "This list is for discussion between the members of the Internet Area directorate." List-Unsubscribe: , List-Archive: List-Post: List-Help: List-Subscribe: , X-List-Received-Date: Sat, 27 Nov 2021 02:19:14 -0000 Reviewer: Donald Eastlake Review result: Ready with Issues I am an assigned INT directorate reviewer for draft-ietf-alto-cdni-request-routing-alto-17. These comments were written primarily for the benefit of the Internet Area Directors. Document editors and shepherd should treat these comments just like they would treat comments from any other IETF contributors and resolve them along with any other Last Call comments that have been received. For more details on the INT Directorate, see https://datatracker.ietf.org/group/intdir/about/. Based on my review, if I was on the IESG I would ballot this document as NO OBJECTION. The following are issues I found with this document that SHOULD be corrected before publication and some comments: I am not particularly familiar with the technology in this draft os I may have missed things. Abstract: I believe it should say "the exact protocol is not specified" adding "not". Section 3.7.1: The second paragraph of this section is one very long sentence that I found confusing and which may be inconsistent. Perhaps a structured list would be better than simple text. Section 6.1.1.2: Seems a bit imprecise. I suggest adding at the end "as a decimal number without leading zeros". I was favorably impressed by the relatively complete information included for the Authors in the Authors' Addresses Section. I wish more drafts did this. The following are minor issues (typos, misspelling, minor text improvements) with the document: PID should be expanded on first use. Although, as far as I can see, other acronyms are appropriately expanded on first use. the document might benefit from a terminology section (maybe 1.1 or 2.3) as not everyone may read the document sequentially and remember all the expansions. Section 2.2, 2nd *'ed paragraph, "ALTO maps can be signed" adding "be". Section 3.6: I don't think the following text is needed and it could be deleted. It merely expresses the default that later IETF documents can modify earlier IETF documents. There may be other documents extending BaseAdvertisementObject and additional CDNI capabilities. They are outside the scope of this document. To support them, future documents can extend the specification defined in this document. Section 3.7.1: /// -> // Section 6.2.1: "to define" -> "defining" Section 10: It is common to include the same information for Contributors as is included for Authors in the Authors' Addresses section but that has not been done. There are a few addition suggestions that I will send directly to the authors. Really trivial: when you have "xyz": stuff for various values of xyz and stuff, there is no consistency in whether or not there is a space before the colon. From nobody Mon Nov 29 23:53:29 2021 Return-Path: X-Original-To: int-dir@ietf.org Delivered-To: int-dir@ietfa.amsl.com Received: from ietfa.amsl.com (localhost [IPv6:::1]) by ietfa.amsl.com (Postfix) with ESMTP id 004DB3A10E2 for ; Mon, 29 Nov 2021 23:53:27 -0800 (PST) MIME-Version: 1.0 Content-Type: text/plain; charset="utf-8" Content-Transfer-Encoding: 7bit From: Carlos Bernardos via Datatracker To: X-Test-IDTracker: no X-IETF-IDTracker: 7.40.0 Auto-Submitted: auto-generated Precedence: bulk Reply-To: bevolz@gmail.com, cjbc@it.uc3m.es, Carlos Bernardos Message-ID: <163825880797.19925.9677931648486797913@ietfa.amsl.com> Date: Mon, 29 Nov 2021 23:53:27 -0800 Archived-At: Subject: [Int-dir] Open review assignments in intdir X-BeenThere: int-dir@ietf.org X-Mailman-Version: 2.1.29 List-Id: "This list is for discussion between the members of the Internet Area directorate." List-Unsubscribe: , List-Archive: List-Post: List-Help: List-Subscribe: , X-List-Received-Date: Tue, 30 Nov 2021 07:53:28 -0000 Hi all, The following reviewers have assignments: For telechat 2021-12-02 Reviewer LC end Draft Zhen Cao 2021-09-28 draft-ietf-pim-bfd-p2mp-use-case-09 Tim Chown 2021-10-26 draft-ietf-idr-bgp-ext-com-registry-04 Sheng Jiang 2021-10-27 draft-ietf-regext-rfc7484bis-04 Last calls: Reviewer LC end Draft Zhen Cao 2021-09-28 draft-ietf-pim-bfd-p2mp-use-case-09 Tim Chown 2021-10-26 draft-ietf-idr-bgp-ext-com-registry-04 Sheng Jiang 2021-10-27 draft-ietf-regext-rfc7484bis-04 Suresh Krishnan 2021-09-07 draft-ietf-bess-evpn-igmp-mld-proxy-14 Charles Perkins 2021-09-07 draft-ietf-bess-evpn-bum-procedure-updates-14 Next in the reviewer rotation: Suresh Krishnan David Lamparter David Lawrence Ted Lemon Benno Overeinder Basavaraj Patil Tommy Pauly Charles Perkins Carlos Pignataro Dave Thaler As a helpful reference for reviewers, please check the Directorates Guidelines available at: https://trac.ietf.org/trac/iesg/wiki/DirectoratesGuidelines Reviews must include the following boilerplate text in the comments sent: "I am an assigned INT directorate reviewer for . These comments were written primarily for the benefit of the Internet Area Directors. Document editors and shepherd(s) should treat these comments just like they would treat comments from any other IETF contributors and resolve them along with any other Last Call comments that have been received. For more details on the INT Directorate, see https://datatracker.ietf.org/group/intdir/about/ ." For INT Area documents, reviewers must provide a recommendation if the document is ready to go to Last Call and therefore be forwarded to the IESG. For non-INT Area document, the reviewer must give a recommendation as to how the INT ADs are to complete the ballot on the document and the reason for that recommendation. See https://www.ietf.org/iesg/voting-procedures.html. Comments provided MUST be in the order of significance (i.e., those issues that are serious and must be fixed (i.e., DISCUSS level issues) MUST be first). While comments on minor issues (typos, etc.) are welcome, they should be last. A template review response might be: -8-<- BEGIN TEMPLATE -8-<- I am an assigned INT directorate reviewer for . These comments were written primarily for the benefit of the Internet Area Directors. Document editors and shepherd(s) should treat these comments just like they would treat comments from any other IETF contributors and resolve them along with any other Last Call comments that have been received. For more details on the INT Directorate, see https://datatracker.ietf.org/group/intdir/about/ . [INT Area documents] Based on my review, the document [IS, IS NOT] ready to go to IETF Last Call and therefore [CAN, CANNOT] be forwarded to the IESG [Non-INT Area documents] Based on my review, if I was on the IESG I would ballot this document as [YES, NO OBJECTION, DISCUSS, RETURN TO WG (ABSTAIN)]. I have the following DISCUSS/ABSTAIN level issues: The following are other issues I found with this document that SHOULD be corrected before publication: The following are minor issues (typos, misspelling, minor text improvements) with the document: -8-<- END TEMPLATE -8-<- From nobody Tue Nov 30 05:49:02 2021 Return-Path: X-Original-To: int-dir@ietfa.amsl.com Delivered-To: int-dir@ietfa.amsl.com Received: from localhost (localhost [127.0.0.1]) by ietfa.amsl.com (Postfix) with ESMTP id 4CE393A12CD; Tue, 30 Nov 2021 05:48:59 -0800 (PST) X-Virus-Scanned: amavisd-new at amsl.com X-Spam-Flag: NO X-Spam-Score: -0.854 X-Spam-Level: X-Spam-Status: No, score=-0.854 tagged_above=-999 required=5 tests=[BAYES_00=-1.9, DKIM_SIGNED=0.1, DKIM_VALID=-0.1, DKIM_VALID_AU=-0.1, DKIM_VALID_EF=-0.1, FREEMAIL_FROM=0.001, HTML_MESSAGE=0.001, NORMAL_HTTP_TO_IP=0.001, NUMERIC_HTTP_ADDR=1.242, SPF_HELO_NONE=0.001, SPF_PASS=-0.001, URIBL_BLOCKED=0.001] autolearn=ham autolearn_force=no Authentication-Results: ietfa.amsl.com (amavisd-new); dkim=pass (2048-bit key) header.d=gmail.com Received: from mail.ietf.org ([4.31.198.44]) by localhost (ietfa.amsl.com [127.0.0.1]) (amavisd-new, port 10024) with ESMTP id W_EHG-8nah9E; Tue, 30 Nov 2021 05:48:54 -0800 (PST) Received: from mail-wm1-x32f.google.com (mail-wm1-x32f.google.com [IPv6:2a00:1450:4864:20::32f]) (using TLSv1.2 with cipher ECDHE-RSA-AES128-GCM-SHA256 (128/128 bits)) (No client certificate requested) by ietfa.amsl.com (Postfix) with ESMTPS id 4ABD53A0B51; Tue, 30 Nov 2021 05:48:54 -0800 (PST) Received: by mail-wm1-x32f.google.com with SMTP id p18so17490452wmq.5; Tue, 30 Nov 2021 05:48:54 -0800 (PST) DKIM-Signature: v=1; a=rsa-sha256; c=relaxed/relaxed; d=gmail.com; s=20210112; h=mime-version:references:in-reply-to:from:date:message-id:subject:to :cc; bh=QBZ3y9hvGM38wlGa3CuKW3jZnSyx0dQKfsMMaPD8yPQ=; b=MKH7X+vEksnFv4rZlKa6/ppEkP84LHfhV95TEDnSV4yOCALTGE6ZDSClHGL850jVvf 7uZl4dsNifx90Uek/2i02tskE6epVw8Pjl5Ay73MN+sjUllNj/MumhCFde8LQIOovGdT owcGuLOkn/LHD8v6XXuRIYmze1oFlDmRRBsZm89xjiRP5V4bjXta1uQ32a2eYV+doTH9 G1Tfd0dw0Ir41AWxQ33xxbyShSMyREg4gm9rs85Xx2EXosZintjisKhBTt5fkOYZhBnC mAZ7PhYHVyRpvVp+Is6vFJSKgdmdXG9Y80ySc8fUuvlL8/cVgJxk5DjMpoewwsZ6mFxB uREA== X-Google-DKIM-Signature: v=1; a=rsa-sha256; c=relaxed/relaxed; d=1e100.net; s=20210112; h=x-gm-message-state:mime-version:references:in-reply-to:from:date :message-id:subject:to:cc; bh=QBZ3y9hvGM38wlGa3CuKW3jZnSyx0dQKfsMMaPD8yPQ=; b=gXILCp2ptuhEGqiJwLIiFl0VrJ7VQ59oa4+eJFGIe420yMu6E4t84fECqgZDy8Y7EQ NoEZK+Ayl3i6Ppmx2r8St8GVCIsZVwuAeFR/LDNumacwNvIdkT6DcMuq6tEfz9ndiP0m PcyRn6SLDrwQjZIbRp1USzdUikPq05FeIStoBpUMW+T1zaheF4HIM2btj7BdBQMBh3AK FfE5QarETnT1ihUXfKcK5KbIaKXNEP00HahgRg1jJnK0TkCoYQV+DFfYJpZvhlQXdp8O 9PpUVxkN/CZgwcl4YmWmXBgnU9smzL0t8AvpybbhrarNSLMi2Szaz+nGAOMg8JY9wrTX Scpw== X-Gm-Message-State: AOAM532l0YxqyJ/4tL1gYNtQHHmYDuo4T9R3CoysYiyU0h30i2FOrHfN jM3j7iero1anmAexNkd6utygwtVGjvSRoJtYo+jt7KvWSoQ= X-Google-Smtp-Source: ABdhPJymdYKIvqJhM29AqNGhPzVajwLnIOD0N6Nlk3rY7JvrHf+vtYhcQGxU7PDa70l7Yh113sm4vzZmfCDm5wO2QLc= X-Received: by 2002:a1c:790d:: with SMTP id l13mr5318624wme.101.1638280127651; Tue, 30 Nov 2021 05:48:47 -0800 (PST) MIME-Version: 1.0 References: <163797955386.15136.492591265431363669@ietfa.amsl.com> In-Reply-To: <163797955386.15136.492591265431363669@ietfa.amsl.com> From: Jensen Zhang Date: Tue, 30 Nov 2021 21:48:37 +0800 Message-ID: To: Donald Eastlake Cc: int-dir@ietf.org, last-call@ietf.org, IETF ALTO , draft-ietf-alto-cdni-request-routing-alto.all@ietf.org Content-Type: multipart/alternative; boundary="0000000000000d235605d201d15b" Archived-At: Subject: Re: [Int-dir] [alto] Intdir telechat review of draft-ietf-alto-cdni-request-routing-alto-17 X-BeenThere: int-dir@ietf.org X-Mailman-Version: 2.1.29 Precedence: list List-Id: "This list is for discussion between the members of the Internet Area directorate." List-Unsubscribe: , List-Archive: List-Post: List-Help: List-Subscribe: , X-List-Received-Date: Tue, 30 Nov 2021 13:48:59 -0000 --0000000000000d235605d201d15b Content-Type: text/plain; charset="UTF-8" Hi Donald, Many thanks for your review. Please see my responses inline. Thanks, Jensen On Sat, Nov 27, 2021 at 10:19 AM Donald Eastlake via Datatracker < noreply@ietf.org> wrote: > Reviewer: Donald Eastlake > Review result: Ready with Issues > > I am an assigned INT directorate reviewer for > draft-ietf-alto-cdni-request-routing-alto-17. These comments were written > primarily for the benefit of the Internet Area Directors. Document editors > and > shepherd should treat these comments just like they would treat comments > from > any other IETF contributors and resolve them along with any other Last Call > comments that have been received. For more details on the INT Directorate, > see > https://datatracker.ietf.org/group/intdir/about/. > > Based on my review, if I was on the IESG I would ballot this document as NO > OBJECTION. > > The following are issues I found with this document that SHOULD be > corrected > before publication and some comments: > > I am not particularly familiar with the technology in this draft os I > may > have missed things. > > Abstract: I believe it should say "the exact protocol is not specified" > adding "not". > Thanks for the catch. We will fix it. > > Section 3.7.1: The second paragraph of this section is one very long > sentence that I found confusing and which may be inconsistent. Perhaps a > structured list would be better than simple text. > Good suggestion. How about the following restructure: OLD: Specifically, the IRD announces two network maps, one CDNI Advertisement resource without dependency, one CDNI Advertisement resource depending on a network map, one filtered CDNI Advertisement resource to be defined in Section 5, one property map including "cdni-capabilities" as its entity property, one filtered property map including "cdni-capabilities" and "pid" as its entity properties, and two update stream services (one for updating CDNI Advertisement resources, and the other for updating property maps). NEW: Specifically, the IRD announces nine information resources as follows: * two network maps * one CDNI Advertisement resource without dependency * one CDNI Advertisement resource depending on a network map * one filtered CDNI Advertisement resource to be defined in Section 5 * one property map including "cdni-capabilities" as its entity property * one filtered property map including "cdni-capabilities" and "pid" as its entity properties * two update stream services + one for updating CDNI Advertisement resources + one for updating property maps > > Section 6.1.1.2: Seems a bit imprecise. I suggest adding at the end > "as a > decimal number without leading zeros". > Very good suggestion. We will add it. > > I was favorably impressed by the relatively complete information > included > for the Authors in the Authors' Addresses Section. I wish more drafts > did > this. > Thanks ;) > > The following are minor issues (typos, misspelling, minor text > improvements) > with the document: > > PID should be expanded on first use. Although, as far as I can see, > other > acronyms are appropriately expanded on first use. the document might > benefit > from a terminology section (maybe 1.1 or 2.3) as not everyone may read > the > document sequentially and remember all the expansions. > Reasonable suggestion. We will add such a section in the coming revision soon. > > Section 2.2, 2nd *'ed paragraph, "ALTO maps can be signed" adding "be". > Thanks for the catch. > > Section 3.6: I don't think the following text is needed and it could be > deleted. It merely expresses the default that later IETF documents can > modify earlier IETF documents. > There may be other > documents extending BaseAdvertisementObject and additional CDNI > capabilities. They are outside the scope of this document. To > support them, future documents can extend the specification defined > in this document. > Agree. > > Section 3.7.1: /// -> // > > Section 6.2.1: "to define" -> "defining" > Thanks. Will fix. > > Section 10: It is common to include the same information for > Contributors as > is included for Authors in the Authors' Addresses section but that has > not > been done. > Good catch. We will definitely fix this issue. We were using kramdown-rfc2629, which seems not to support the Contributors section yet. But it should work by embedding XML manually. > There are a few addition suggestions that I will send directly to the > authors. > > Really trivial: when you have > "xyz": stuff > for various values of xyz and stuff, there is no consistency in whether or > not > there is a space before the colon. > Ha, you are right. We will fix this trivial issue. > > > > _______________________________________________ > alto mailing list > alto@ietf.org > https://www.ietf.org/mailman/listinfo/alto > --0000000000000d235605d201d15b Content-Type: text/html; charset="UTF-8" Content-Transfer-Encoding: quoted-printable
Hi=C2=A0Donald,
Many thanks for your review. Please see my responses=C2=A0inlin= e.

Thanks,
Jens= en


On Sat, Nov 27, 2021 at= 10:19 AM Donald Eastlake via Datatracker <noreply@ietf.org> wrote:
Reviewer: Donald Eastlake
Review result: Ready with Issues

I am an assigned INT directorate reviewer for
draft-ietf-alto-cdni-request-routing-alto-17. These comments were written primarily for the benefit of the Internet Area Directors. Document editors = and
shepherd should treat these comments just like they would treat comments fr= om
any other IETF contributors and resolve them along with any other Last Call=
comments that have been received. For more details on the INT Directorate, = see
https://datatracker.ietf.org/group/intdir/about/= .

Based on my review, if I was on the IESG I would ballot this document as NO=
OBJECTION.

The following are issues I found with this document that SHOULD be correcte= d
before publication and some comments:

=C2=A0 =C2=A0I am not particularly familiar with the technology in this dra= ft os I may
=C2=A0 =C2=A0have missed things.

=C2=A0 =C2=A0Abstract: I believe it should say "the exact protocol is = not specified"
=C2=A0 =C2=A0adding "not".

Th= anks for the catch. We will fix it.
=C2=A0

=C2=A0 =C2=A0Section 3.7.1: The second paragraph of this section is one ver= y long
=C2=A0 =C2=A0sentence that I found confusing and which may be inconsistent.= Perhaps a
=C2=A0 =C2=A0structured list would be better than simple text.

Good suggestion. How about the following restructur= e:

OLD:

=C2=A0 =C2=A0Spec= ifically, the IRD announces two network maps, one CDNI
=C2=A0 =C2=A0Adve= rtisement resource without dependency, one CDNI Advertisement
=C2=A0 =C2= =A0resource depending on a network map, one filtered CDNI Advertisement
= =C2=A0 =C2=A0resource to be defined in Section 5, one property map includin= g
=C2=A0 =C2=A0"cdni-capabilities" as its entity property, one= filtered property map
=C2=A0 =C2=A0including "cdni-capabilities&qu= ot; and "pid" as its entity properties, and
=C2=A0 =C2=A0two u= pdate stream services (one for updating CDNI Advertisement
=C2=A0 =C2=A0= resources, and the other for updating property maps).

NEW:

=C2=A0 =C2=A0Specifically, the IRD an= nounces nine information resources as follows:

=C2= =A0 =C2=A0* two network maps
=C2=A0 =C2=A0* one CDNI Advertisemen= t resource without dependency
=C2=A0 =C2=A0* one CDNI Advertiseme= nt resource depending on a network map
=C2=A0 =C2=A0* one filtere= d CDNI Advertisement resource to be defined in Section 5
=C2=A0 = =C2=A0* one property map including "cdni-capabilities" as its ent= ity property
=C2=A0 =C2=A0* one filtered property map including &= quot;cdni-capabilities" and "pid" as its entity properties
=C2=A0 =C2=A0* two update stream services
=C2=A0 =C2=A0 = =C2=A0 +=C2=A0one f= or updating CDNI Advertisement resources
=C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 + o= ne for updating property maps
=C2=A0

=C2=A0 =C2=A0Section 6.1.1.2: Seems a bit imprecise. I suggest adding at the end= "as a
=C2=A0 =C2=A0decimal number without leading zeros".

Very good suggestion. We will add it.
=C2=A0

=C2=A0 =C2=A0I was favorably impressed by the relatively complete informati= on included
=C2=A0 =C2=A0for the Authors in the Authors' Addresses Section. I wish = more drafts did
=C2=A0 =C2=A0this.

Thanks ;)
= =C2=A0

The following are minor issues (typos, misspelling, minor text improvements= )
with the document:

=C2=A0 =C2=A0PID should be expanded on first use. Although, as far as I can= see, other
=C2=A0 =C2=A0acronyms are appropriately expanded on first use. the document= might benefit
=C2=A0 =C2=A0from a terminology section (maybe 1.1 or 2.3) as not everyone = may read the
=C2=A0 =C2=A0document sequentially and remember all the expansions.

Reasonable suggestion. We will add such a sect= ion in the coming revision soon.
=C2=A0

=C2=A0 =C2=A0Section 2.2, 2nd *'ed paragraph, "ALTO maps can be si= gned" adding "be".

Thank= s for the catch.
=C2=A0

=C2=A0 =C2=A0Section 3.6: I don't think the following text is needed an= d it could be
=C2=A0 =C2=A0deleted. It merely expresses the default that later IETF docum= ents can
=C2=A0 =C2=A0modify earlier IETF documents.
=C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2= =A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 = =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0There may be other
=C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 documents extending BaseAdvertisementObject and additi= onal CDNI
=C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 capabilities.=C2=A0 They are outside the scope of this= document.=C2=A0 To
=C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 support them, future documents can extend the specific= ation defined
=C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 in this document.

= Agree.
=C2=A0

=C2=A0 =C2=A0Section 3.7.1:=C2=A0 /// -> //

=C2=A0 =C2=A0Section 6.2.1: "to define" -> "defining"= ;

Thanks. Will fix.
=C2=A0

=C2=A0 =C2=A0Section 10: It is common to include the same information for C= ontributors as
=C2=A0 =C2=A0is included for Authors in the Authors' Addresses section = but that has not
=C2=A0 =C2=A0been done.

Good catch. We = will definitely fix this issue. We were using kramdown-rfc2629, which seems= not to support=C2=A0the=C2=A0Contributors section yet. But it should work = by embedding XML manually.


=C2=A0 =C2=A0There are a few addition suggestions that I will send directly= to the
=C2=A0 =C2=A0authors.

=C2=A0 =C2=A0Really trivial: when you have
=C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0"xyz": stuff
for various values of xyz and stuff, there is no consistency in whether or = not
there is a space before the colon.

Ha, = you are right. We will fix this trivial issue.
=C2=A0



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Tue, 30 Nov 2021 15:20:56 +0000 From: "Eric Vyncke (evyncke)" To: Donald Eastlake , "int-dir@ietf.org" CC: "last-call@ietf.org" , "alto@ietf.org" , "draft-ietf-alto-cdni-request-routing-alto.all@ietf.org" Thread-Topic: [Int-dir] Intdir telechat review of draft-ietf-alto-cdni-request-routing-alto-17 Thread-Index: AQHX4zU8fHT9tPuGvE6P6yYwftVfG6wcRhWA Date: Tue, 30 Nov 2021 15:20:56 +0000 Message-ID: <0321766E-BB1F-40AB-BE93-810BC28FA7B8@cisco.com> References: <163797955386.15136.492591265431363669@ietfa.amsl.com> In-Reply-To: <163797955386.15136.492591265431363669@ietfa.amsl.com> Accept-Language: fr-BE, en-US Content-Language: en-GB X-MS-Has-Attach: X-MS-TNEF-Correlator: user-agent: Microsoft-MacOutlook/16.54.21101001 authentication-results: dkim=none (message not signed) header.d=none;dmarc=none action=none header.from=cisco.com; x-ms-publictraffictype: Email x-ms-office365-filtering-correlation-id: 7a015397-34cd-4bfe-473b-08d9b4150195 x-ms-traffictypediagnostic: PH0PR11MB5157: x-microsoft-antispam-prvs: x-ms-oob-tlc-oobclassifiers: OLM:10000; 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22:47:16 -0500 Message-ID: To: Jensen Zhang Cc: int-dir@ietf.org, Last Call , IETF ALTO , draft-ietf-alto-cdni-request-routing-alto.all@ietf.org Content-Type: text/plain; charset="UTF-8" Archived-At: Subject: Re: [Int-dir] [alto] Intdir telechat review of draft-ietf-alto-cdni-request-routing-alto-17 X-BeenThere: int-dir@ietf.org X-Mailman-Version: 2.1.29 Precedence: list List-Id: "This list is for discussion between the members of the Internet Area directorate." List-Unsubscribe: , List-Archive: List-Post: List-Help: List-Subscribe: , X-List-Received-Date: Wed, 01 Dec 2021 03:47:34 -0000 Hi Jensen, Thanks for your agreeable response. I'm happy with your re-wording of the second paragraph of Section 3.7.1. Assuming the draft is changed as described in your response, I consider all my comments to have been resolved. Donald =============================== Donald E. Eastlake 3rd +1-508-333-2270 (cell) 2386 Panoramic Circle, Apopka, FL 32703 USA d3e3e3@gmail.com On Tue, Nov 30, 2021 at 8:48 AM Jensen Zhang wrote: > > Hi Donald, > > Many thanks for your review. Please see my responses inline. > > Thanks, > Jensen > > > On Sat, Nov 27, 2021 at 10:19 AM Donald Eastlake via Datatracker wrote: >> >> Reviewer: Donald Eastlake >> Review result: Ready with Issues >> >> I am an assigned INT directorate reviewer for >> draft-ietf-alto-cdni-request-routing-alto-17. These comments were written >> primarily for the benefit of the Internet Area Directors. Document editors and >> shepherd should treat these comments just like they would treat comments from >> any other IETF contributors and resolve them along with any other Last Call >> comments that have been received. For more details on the INT Directorate, see >> https://datatracker.ietf.org/group/intdir/about/. >> >> Based on my review, if I was on the IESG I would ballot this document as NO >> OBJECTION. >> >> The following are issues I found with this document that SHOULD be corrected >> before publication and some comments: >> >> I am not particularly familiar with the technology in this draft os I may >> have missed things. >> >> Abstract: I believe it should say "the exact protocol is not specified" >> adding "not". > > > Thanks for the catch. We will fix it. > >> >> >> Section 3.7.1: The second paragraph of this section is one very long >> sentence that I found confusing and which may be inconsistent. Perhaps a >> structured list would be better than simple text. > > > Good suggestion. How about the following restructure: > > OLD: > > Specifically, the IRD announces two network maps, one CDNI > Advertisement resource without dependency, one CDNI Advertisement > resource depending on a network map, one filtered CDNI Advertisement > resource to be defined in Section 5, one property map including > "cdni-capabilities" as its entity property, one filtered property map > including "cdni-capabilities" and "pid" as its entity properties, and > two update stream services (one for updating CDNI Advertisement > resources, and the other for updating property maps). > > NEW: > > Specifically, the IRD announces nine information resources as follows: > > * two network maps > * one CDNI Advertisement resource without dependency > * one CDNI Advertisement resource depending on a network map > * one filtered CDNI Advertisement resource to be defined in Section 5 > * one property map including "cdni-capabilities" as its entity property > * one filtered property map including "cdni-capabilities" and "pid" as its entity properties > * two update stream services > + one for updating CDNI Advertisement resources > + one for updating property maps > >> >> >> Section 6.1.1.2: Seems a bit imprecise. I suggest adding at the end "as a >> decimal number without leading zeros". > > > Very good suggestion. We will add it. > >> >> >> I was favorably impressed by the relatively complete information included >> for the Authors in the Authors' Addresses Section. I wish more drafts did >> this. > > > Thanks ;) > >> >> >> The following are minor issues (typos, misspelling, minor text improvements) >> with the document: >> >> PID should be expanded on first use. Although, as far as I can see, other >> acronyms are appropriately expanded on first use. the document might benefit >> from a terminology section (maybe 1.1 or 2.3) as not everyone may read the >> document sequentially and remember all the expansions. > > > Reasonable suggestion. We will add such a section in the coming revision soon. > >> >> >> Section 2.2, 2nd *'ed paragraph, "ALTO maps can be signed" adding "be". > > > Thanks for the catch. > >> >> >> Section 3.6: I don't think the following text is needed and it could be >> deleted. It merely expresses the default that later IETF documents can >> modify earlier IETF documents. >> There may be other >> documents extending BaseAdvertisementObject and additional CDNI >> capabilities. They are outside the scope of this document. To >> support them, future documents can extend the specification defined >> in this document. > > > Agree. > >> >> >> Section 3.7.1: /// -> // >> >> Section 6.2.1: "to define" -> "defining" > > > Thanks. Will fix. > >> >> >> Section 10: It is common to include the same information for Contributors as >> is included for Authors in the Authors' Addresses section but that has not >> been done. > > > Good catch. We will definitely fix this issue. We were using kramdown-rfc2629, which seems not to support the Contributors section yet. But it should work by embedding XML manually. > >> >> There are a few addition suggestions that I will send directly to the >> authors. >> >> Really trivial: when you have >> "xyz": stuff >> for various values of xyz and stuff, there is no consistency in whether or not >> there is a space before the colon. > > > Ha, you are right. We will fix this trivial issue. > >> >> >> >> >> _______________________________________________ >> alto mailing list >> alto@ietf.org >> https://www.ietf.org/mailman/listinfo/alto From nobody Tue Nov 30 20:49:04 2021 Return-Path: X-Original-To: int-dir@ietfa.amsl.com Delivered-To: int-dir@ietfa.amsl.com Received: from localhost (localhost [127.0.0.1]) by ietfa.amsl.com (Postfix) with ESMTP id 599DC3A0A7E; Tue, 30 Nov 2021 20:48:52 -0800 (PST) X-Virus-Scanned: amavisd-new at amsl.com X-Spam-Flag: NO X-Spam-Score: -1.897 X-Spam-Level: X-Spam-Status: No, score=-1.897 tagged_above=-999 required=5 tests=[BAYES_00=-1.9, RCVD_IN_MSPIKE_H3=0.001, RCVD_IN_MSPIKE_WL=0.001, SPF_HELO_NONE=0.001, SPF_PASS=-0.001, URIBL_BLOCKED=0.001] autolearn=ham autolearn_force=no Received: from mail.ietf.org ([4.31.198.44]) by localhost (ietfa.amsl.com [127.0.0.1]) (amavisd-new, port 10024) with ESMTP id 5iEAdNZfeiE4; Tue, 30 Nov 2021 20:48:49 -0800 (PST) Received: from frasgout.his.huawei.com (frasgout.his.huawei.com [185.176.79.56]) (using TLSv1.2 with cipher AECDH-AES256-SHA (256/256 bits)) (No client certificate requested) by ietfa.amsl.com (Postfix) with ESMTPS id DB7903A0A81; Tue, 30 Nov 2021 20:48:48 -0800 (PST) Received: from fraeml712-chm.china.huawei.com (unknown [172.18.147.207]) by frasgout.his.huawei.com (SkyGuard) with ESMTP id 4J3mmS0zPvz67RGn; Wed, 1 Dec 2021 12:47:52 +0800 (CST) Received: from dggeml752-chm.china.huawei.com (10.1.199.151) by fraeml712-chm.china.huawei.com (10.206.15.61) with Microsoft SMTP Server (version=TLS1_2, cipher=TLS_ECDHE_RSA_WITH_AES_128_CBC_SHA256) id 15.1.2308.20; Wed, 1 Dec 2021 05:48:40 +0100 Received: from dggeml753-chm.china.huawei.com (10.1.199.152) by dggeml752-chm.china.huawei.com (10.1.199.151) with Microsoft SMTP Server (version=TLS1_2, cipher=TLS_ECDHE_RSA_WITH_AES_128_CBC_SHA256_P256) id 15.1.2308.20; Wed, 1 Dec 2021 12:48:38 +0800 Received: from dggeml753-chm.china.huawei.com ([10.1.199.152]) by dggeml753-chm.china.huawei.com ([10.1.199.152]) with mapi id 15.01.2308.020; Wed, 1 Dec 2021 12:48:38 +0800 From: Qin Wu To: Donald Eastlake , Jensen Zhang CC: Last Call , "draft-ietf-alto-cdni-request-routing-alto.all@ietf.org" , IETF ALTO , "int-dir@ietf.org" Thread-Topic: [alto] Intdir telechat review of draft-ietf-alto-cdni-request-routing-alto-17 Thread-Index: Adfmbn1wS6Sr9He9PECcbEJ316/8jQ== Date: Wed, 1 Dec 2021 04:48:38 +0000 Message-ID: Accept-Language: zh-CN, en-US Content-Language: zh-CN X-MS-Has-Attach: X-MS-TNEF-Correlator: x-originating-ip: [10.136.100.16] Content-Type: text/plain; charset="gb2312" Content-Transfer-Encoding: base64 MIME-Version: 1.0 X-CFilter-Loop: Reflected Archived-At: Subject: Re: [Int-dir] [alto] Intdir telechat review of draft-ietf-alto-cdni-request-routing-alto-17 X-BeenThere: int-dir@ietf.org X-Mailman-Version: 2.1.29 Precedence: list List-Id: "This list is for discussion between the members of the Internet Area directorate." 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